Mother’s Day for the Childless

Mother’s Day, a day we honor the mother’s who have taken care of us.  A day when children show their appreciation and make homemade gifts for the person who gave them life.  Mother’s are praised for all they do to care for their children and run a household.  But what about those who want to be a mother but can’t due to medical reasons?  Are they less of a person because they are not a mother?

Mother’s Day for some is a day of grief, a yearly reminder of what they will never be able to experience.  What can those without children do to ease the pain?  How do you overcome the loss?  I have experienced this loss myself.  I struggle with the idea that because I am not a mother like others that I am not as successful in life.  I find myself worrying about being alone in the future.  Who will care for me when I am old?  I feel like others think of me as selfish because I don’t have children.  Well, it’s not that I don’t want them, I can’t have them.  So I have grieved and I understand that medical illness and childbirth do not agree.  For whatever reason, it is not in God’s plan for me to be a mother.  I do not feel like less of a women though.  The pain from loss and struggles I have endured from my illnesses have given me strength, courage, and empathy.  I am able to help others with their struggles because I have experienced it myself.

So what do I do?  I volunteer at my church with a ministry for parents who have children with Special Needs.  This helps satisfy my want to be with children and at the same time help the community.  One year for Mother’s Day I invited the mother’s to my home and gave them a “spa” treatment.  We did mini manicures and pedicures, I played relaxing music and had snacks for them.  During that time the children were being cared for by our volunteers at church. They appreciated it so much and I enjoyed the time also.  Pampering other mother’s you know such as sisters, aunts, your own mother, mother-in-law, etc. may help ease the pain a little by spreading your love to them.  In addition, you can be satisfied by nurturing others’  needs.

To summarize 1 Peter 3:  8-9:  ….be a blessing and you will be blessed.

Until next time,

Danya

 

 

 

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